Environment

I am probably getting a bit old now for a biological family of my own (but then again you never know) but regardless, whatever happens to me, I wanted to discuss my beliefs on family, because out of love comes family- and I was one of those kids that fortunately came from a very good, if not excellent home, and that made all the difference in the world to me, in my attitudes, in my opinions etc., especially on the subject of love.

Because to me, love is... first and foremost, and exclusively an attitude, not just a ritual or an attraction, love is something that brings out the good in all, and in everything, and in everyone that is affected by what we say or do.

Likewise, I have to admit I am a big fan of Zig Ziglar. www.ziglar.com. If you don't know who he is by the way, try doing a Google search; or look for some of his material posted on youtube.com. I think we all need to do exactly what he proposes, one to the other, attitude is everything and so is the power of love and respect.

We also need his proposals in our personal, professional and our family lives as well. He proposes, a, "Check up, from the neck up" so that all of us might avoid, "Stinkin Thinkin'" (detrimental to success) which he says leads to another serious disease he mentions called, "Hardening of the Attitudes"

I think most men and women who suffer in abusive relationships have heard of and experienced this disease. Very sad isn't it? The attitudes men and woman display towards those they claim to "love"

For example, I never understood myself why human beings in so called, "loving relationships" are so hard on each other? Why both their attitudes and their actions for that matter are so much of a negative nature. What good can come from verbal abuse, from neglect? from alcoholism? Laziness? Sexually promiscuity? or immorality in general? or for that matter violence or drugs in some cases? and how can we be this way towards other human beings we say we love, knowing the consequences for doing so, upon those other human beings is still so great regardless.

The problems mentioned above are obviously are not our "home problems" as we claim, but are something more basic. They reside BETWEEN OUR OWN EARS, it is our thoughts and our thinking which make our world what it is (or isn't)

Obviously children learn all that is good, all that is virtuous, and all the is positive from us.

And likewise, if parents (the pair of them or even ONE of them) have thoughts of a negative nature towards their mate or others in life, or society etc... What will they and their children believe about life in general, what attitudes and bad habits will they emulate? How will such human beings in the future see themselves and other people? How will they act towards other people they come across, in schools. communities, work etc.?

I think some of you ladies I have talked to are wonderful mothers- truly I do, and I commend you for your valiant efforts at making your home all that it is, but I am a bit heartbroken at times that only one person is there to raise those children of yours, its obviously is better when two loving people can be there to act as re-enforcements.

Preferably, and ideally, a man and a woman, who both have a positive attitude and work together for common goals. Entire lives can be changed, even in bad homes, if children, can only start to be raised by these kind of like-minded people who are positive, people who are respectful and people who act as morally concerned adults, towards each other, and their families.

Children who see negativity and abuse will carry it into their own lives, and into their own thinking as well. Their lives will be limited and their thoughts will be of a destructive manner. They likewise, often times, can even end up going to jail for their bad habits they have seemed to adopt from the influencing like-minded parent.

So, obviously,

The best age to actually UN-learn these bad habits is between 15 and 18. And if one can accomplish this feat during those years, Children will have a chance in the real world- because no sooner are they children, when lo and behold they are now adults seeking employment and a workplace in society.

Environment is the key; and through a good environment, old habits can be unlearned, and good thoughts, actions and beliefs can be emulated by the love and kindness of responsible adults who understand what love and respect is.

Love and positivity, hope and respect.- that is the key!

When we treat our spouse positively and when we are thinking positively as well, we are role playing success, for the children to see and participate in.

These are the life changing values that reform a broken home; that bring romance between the sexes to fruition; and that generally add harmony to the home and its environment in general. It is never too late to reform, but it is best to do it before the children become adults, so that they can also function in its full capacity before being, "thrown out into the world" to make their way.

- Dewaine